Breaking News: World Better without Emails?

hello, this is Reporter Drama Queen with breaking news. i'm here with Computer and Paper, arguing about weither or not emailing should be legal. OMGosh! What is wrong with these Dumb-Os? Paper has a point, arguing with Computer, "People SOOOOOOoooo abuse email, LYING about people...." this is where she breaks down, sobbing. Paper continues,"My close friends won't even...TALK to m-m-me!!!" She continues sobbing. Suddenly, nicole comes with her guitar, whipping her newly cut hair back. "i think this is a new inspiration for my song! that happened to me, too!" (Zach) "WHAT!!!! That is a terrible story!" said the author. "Well, I think it's great!" said Drama Queen. "I know! Let's go to Pete! Pete's a great author!" The author picked up the phone and dialed Pete's number.

"ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! OH YA!"   

sang Nicole. "Owwwwwwww! My earss hurt!" said Drama Queen. "What????????" said Pete. BAM! Paper threw Computer against a wall. Computer retaliated by recording Nicole's singing then hooking up to the biggest speakers he could find and playing it. Together, Computer and Nicole were deafening.

"ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! ALL THE PURPLE MONSTERS WERE NAMED SHALOM! OH YA!"

BAM! Paper's ears exploded. The ground shook. I fainted. The shaking intensified. CRASH! The walls collasped. It was the worst earthquake in the history of Fiction!